Sunday, 8 April 2012


I'm in a world
I fit comfortably
I do what's required
Play by the rules 
Smile when they say smile
Do what they do though I don't see things their way
Because on the inside I'm grey

My eyes dont see life's beautiful hues
My soul doesn't sing tunes breezy and full of life--it sings minor harmonies
It plays in a key so sad and depressive on a piano made with keys of doubt
Violins moan in stead of wisp along in happy exciting moments of wonderful memories
The soundtrack of my life is sad and bleak
Because on the inside I'm gray

A color that exists only in shades and different variations from light to dark
Pictures are darkened by me
Given depth by me
Highlight in so many ways through thick, hard, and even swift lines
The lead of the sketches the artist of life creates is the color of me
But you wont let me be that person deep inside
I hide 
In the light
Because on the inside I'm grey

I'm a combination
Like blue and red is purple
Like red and yellow is orange
But you only see the face I put forth
The man the the universe has conditioned me to be
Because you dont see anything as a blend of unique qualities
For you black is black, pink is pink, and white is white
But I'm much more complex 
The beauty I see lives in the idea of grey
The power that can be when forces unite
When we let down our divisions
Our sects, our positions and boxes we try to lock each-other, friends and lovers, enemies and frenemies inside of
So when I say I don't see life's beautiful hues
Thats just me, why should I have to be like you
For it's in the middle where we are all the same and we realise that its our differences that make us this way
So I will take the blacks of my soul and the whites of my heart and mesh them together so they will never part
And swim in endless seas of grey, depressive... maybe
But honest, most definitely 
And you can live in your separated colored world
With no matching harmonies and see everything singularly
So you just see blue I'll see purple
You just see red
And I will see orange
But through all this the one thing I wish I could do
Is show you, teach you, change you, make you into a being more intricate
Who can see more in the world
And do all this without making you quite the same as me
But alas, I'm stuck pretending to be this person I know that I am not
Survival always turns around to bite me in the ass
Sometimes I wish I could just fuck life up the ass
Because I just want to be grey.

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