Saturday 1 October 2016

Betrayal

I came upon a pool of water, it seemed so calm, serene.
Something was saying it wasn't safe I turned to leave but then my heart said
"You can swim.  Dive in"
So I did
The water felt cool and calmed my soul then the voice said "deeper" and so... I dove
Into the cool blue I swam then blue turned to dark
I went to swim back up then the voice promised sweet things were waiting at the bottom
It said "Here I'll help you breathe.  Go just a bit further"
Down I went until I couldn't see my way.

Sunday 21 August 2016

My Heart and I

I followed my heart through hell and it left me there
It promised at the end it would better
Told me that I'd come out of the fire new, reborn, a better me than the me that I was transformed into a being far greater than anything I could see myself being
It sung sweet melodies of strength through pain and hummed a tune of torture so agonising it was actually music to my soul
And when I questioned its motives, how it lead me astray before and I came out, well... not so good, it smooth talked me
Sweetly caressed my fears and made my doubts disappear with words it knew I wanted to hear
Lies It knew I'd make myself believe and follow it into the dark in hopes of the life I'd recieve
Good things come through trials they say so I followed
Endured the pain of burning flesh
The fear of endless darkness and paths of jagged rocks that pierced my skin
The heart knows no bounds and I lept with it into the treacherous beyond
Deeper and deeper with only its smooth sultry voice as my guide to the other side
And at the deepest of deeps
Where only the sound of my breathing echoed in the caverns
My body ragged and torn
My soul broken
My will shattered and my faith in all things at its end I heard a laugh
A sound of pure glee, almost psychotic even, manic
And the more I listened the more it seemed that this laugh wasn't glee
It was the sound of success, accomplishment
Here in the deep my heart was laughing at me telling me how I was so easy
That I never learn and thus was fooled by the same game once more
Then it was gone, no doubt to return again with promises I'll believe again
And then I'll find myself here again
Mad at myself for believing again only to be lost again in a situation specifically designed for me to fail at again and again until my failure becomes the norm
I followed my heart through hell and it left me there to realise I'd never really been gone.




Sunday 8 May 2016

Unseen Touch



Familly members Youngest to oldest and sons. Mother's Day 2016 mom was awarded mother of the year award at her/our church New Testament Church of God Miracle temple Bermuda. And this is the fifth poem I've done for her and this time I had help. I posed the first phrase of each stanza and asked for sentences of any kind and promised I would rework their ideas to fit poetry and sell exactly what it was they were trying to say. The first two siblings after my brother couldn't think of what to write so I had to use some creative skills and morph their exact words from phone conversation into something uniquely them. All in all. I think it came out well. Hope you all like it.

Anthony (second son)
Joan (sister)
Charles (brother)
Phyllis (sister)
Marie (sister)
Bertha (sister)
Kenneth (brother)
Wallace (me)

If I knew that after today, I’d never see you again, 
I'd thank you for believing in me
Encouraging me to strive towards my best. 
Tell you It was Daily Bread on drives from Dockyard that introduced me to my favourite scripture (Hebrews 11:6).
Thank you for all the words and phrases you’ve made up in my lifetime, oftentimes without knowing that fueled countless jokes
Endless laughter.
Remind you that you are one of God's greatest gems 
my Mommie Dearest, one of a kind
there's no one more special.

If I knew that after today I’d never see you again, I don’t know what I’d say. 
There isn’t anything I could say that I haven’t already said. 
And that is saying something.

If I knew that after today I’d never see you again, I wouldn’t be able to think of what to say. 
I’d want it to be personal and uniquely me so you’d know how much I care.

If I knew that after today I’d never see you again, I’d let you know my life would be bleak without you in it. 
Thank God for a sister like you

If I knew that after today I’d never see you again, I’d think about how you love to make pound cake 
Call me when it fell. 
I’d save the day with my super human baking powers and behold 
The next time
Perfect pound cake would be made. 
If our mother were alive still, you’d call her 
But clearly you recognise I’m just as good. 
Maybe even better. 
I’d let you know that I value that you value my advice.

If I knew that after today I’d never see you again, I’d tell you how lucky I was to be blessed with a sister like you.
Who likes to have fun playing group games. 
Is so loving and kind and giving towards others. 
I’d tell you about the love I felt and shared in your presence though I didn’t always verbalise it.

If I knew that after today I’d never see you again, I would be confused, 
quiet. 
I’d think about events gone by, 
Christmas, Cupmatch, church invites. 
No more pollymeat, a childhood nickname
Lost but not forgotten 
I’d use the time to be silent
Remember all the good times shared.

If I knew that after today, I’d never see you again, 
I’d take you in my arms and hold on to you 
Real, real tight. 
I’d experience your touch one last time.