Sunday, 10 May 2015

Morning Run

I see you when I run, or more accurately I feel you
Before I hit the hill I try to stretch my eyes above and beyond to see you waiting for the morning bus, but to no avail
So bobbing left and right the anticipation rises deep inside and I see you before you see me and I tell myself ‘keep a straight face this time’
I fail miserably
Glowing in anticipation of your glow and then… you notice me
You smile
You wave
For seconds the entire world feels like it will be okay and all my troubles melt away and it lingers for a while, long after I’ve passed you by
That is the power you wield in just a smile and a wave
Like magic, a life, instantly healed, saved
I try to leave the gym right on time to see you
Plan far enough ahead the day before to know I wont miss you
Just the thought of this moment consumes my being and then….
I see you and everything is okay
See we have something no one else can claim
Nine months of walking
Laughing crying
Kindness given and pain received
You took me with you through all of your experiences even before I could remember a thing
And I’m sure in your mind this life inside you would grow into something beyond your wildest dreams
What we have, so simple as it may seem is that for nine months you carried me
Wait that can’t be right
For nine months you and I were one
See you didn’t carry me like a cup in your hand
Something you could rest aside and come back to later
I breathed cause you breathed
I ate because you ate
I moved from here to there because you didn’t stay in one place
I was physically connected, corded, joined to your body
A life force that could not survive without your survival
My blood
My heart beat
My feet and hands, eyes, nose, mouth, the hair on my head, all grew and formed by the nourishment you gave me
I once said mother is god in the eyes of a child this is why cause you didn’t carry me but I was formed inside you
Your body was a new life form creation machine
For a time I was you and you where me and without you I definitely could not be
We shared a life quite literally
You gave part of you to me so that I could breathe
So no you did not carry me along, but shared everything, all of you, with me for the months we were one
And when you looked me in the eyes you named me and from then on you loved me just as I was, am, and will grow to be
So when I’m running over the hill I don’t see you, I feel you
That part you gave nothing is strong enough to take away
And should the day come when I’ll see you no more I’ll look at that bus stop, see you smile and wave cause I will see you in my soul from far beyond the grave
Yes even in your absence for a moment my life will be okay
All troubles will melt away
Part of you is in me and that I will always see
Even if my sight is somehow taken from me
And through faith I am here because I know you said that if I was meant to be to not be taken away and if I wasn’t….
Well here I am alive and breathing so I guess I truly am destined to be here
So to make things clear
Thank you for sharing, not carrying me along with you
There are some things far beyond what love can give
And I remember it’s because of them that I do live
When I run up the hill next, I will always see you smile and wave long before my eyes reach you
That part you gave is connected to that smile and wave
My heart and my soul will forever see you, feel you
For I was you and you were me for a time
I’m a product of creation and evidence of what a life shared can do
And you continue to have to power to create change
With something as simple as a smile and a wave.

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